Boeing 737 MAX vs Exxon & Shell

Public:“Safety is our highest priority at Boeing. It is at the core of our culture and how we build airplanes. We will do whatever it takes to ensure the 737 MAX is the safest plane in the skies.”

Private:“This airplane is designed by clowns who in turn are supervised by monkeys.”

Public:“Boeing engineers are empowered to halt any program if quality or safety standards are not meeting our gold-standard requirements.”

Private:“Program milestone bonuses are tied strictly to delivery dates and flight-test certification windows. Any engineering redesign that threatens the airline delivery timeline will be rejected unless backed by a mandatory FAA airworthiness directive.”

Public:“With over 99.7% dispatch reliability, the 737 MAX delivers ultimate confidence, passenger comfort, and unmatched operational safety for your fleet.”

Private:“Pilot A: 'I'll be shocked if the FAA passes this training.' Pilot B: 'Would you put your family on a MAX simulator trained aircraft? I wouldn't.' Pilot A: 'No.'”

Public:“Currently, the scientific evidence is inconclusive as to whether human activities are having a significant effect on the global climate. Projections of disaster are based on completely unproven models.”

Private:“Atmospheric CO2 concentration will reach 415 ppm around 2020, with global temperature increases of 1.0°C above 1970 levels. Mitigation of the 'greenhouse effect' would require major reductions in fossil fuel combustion.”

Public:“The Maneuvering Characteristics Augmentation System (MCAS) operates transparently to the crew and preserves existing 737 handling qualities without requiring simulator differences training.”

Private:“I'll be jedi mind-tricking regulators into accepting the training... probably save Boeing a few hundred million dollars.”

Public:“These communications do not reflect the company we are and need to be, and are completely unacceptable. We have taken appropriate steps to hold employees accountable and reinforce our safety culture.”

Private:“Any request for additional flight simulator hours will trigger executive escalation. The commercial agreement with Southwest guarantees $1 million per plane if simulator training is mandated. Protect the schedule.”

Public:“Reset the climate clock... The science of climate change is too uncertain to mandate a plan of action that could plunge economies into turmoil. Let's not rush to judgment before facts are in.”

Private:“There is general scientific agreement that the most likely manner in which mankind is influencing the global climate is through carbon dioxide release from the burning of fossil fuels... mankind has a time window of 5 to 10 years before the need for hard decisions.”

Public:“Shell is committed to meeting the world's energy demands cleanly and responsibly. Sound environmental policy must rest on validated scientific facts rather than alarmism.”

Private:“By the time the global warming becomes detectable, it could be too late to take effective countermeasures to reduce the effects... Changes in the atmosphere could lead to major shifts in agriculture, coastal inundation, and weather extremes.”

Public:“Our offshore installations are engineered with conservative safety margins against natural North Sea wave height fluctuations.”

Private:“An extra one meter of platform air gap above high-tide level is incorporated specifically to mitigate projected 100-year sea level rise resulting from global greenhouse warming.”